so, whose dick should be shot off?

I'm disgusted this early Tuesday morning to find that, indeed, Eddie Murphy and Tracey Edmonds are engaged. Big ring and all. http://www.eurweb.com/story/eur35462.cfm
The reason why I'm disgusted is far-reaching. (A) Eddie cheated on his gorgeous wife, perhaps numerous times. Even recently, he made his seventh baby with ex-Spice Girl Melanie Brown, and still has not publicly fessed up to the fact that the baby girl is his. Who wants a man who cannot take care of his responsibilities and claim his children? Apparently, Tracey does. (B) Eddie just divorced his wife in April, barely a year ago, after a lengthy marriage. Tracey was married 13 years before her divorce from Babyface, which was finalized when? One month ago?! And they've been dating 10 months or so...? And this is gonna work because why...? (C) Eddie isn't making enough money to support 9 children! 6 "real," 1 "illegitimate," and 2 "steps." His last good movie was what...? And when...? And Shrek doesn't count!

Stars are funny. They claim that them and their partners were having marital "troubles" before the public knew about it. A divorce was "pending" anyway for months. Blah, blah, blah. And I definitely believe that this could be true, and that the public doesn't need to be all up in your business all the time. But now, we're really gonna bite into you because you look really stupid. Come on, Trace! You're too beautiful to be so dumb! What's wrong with just dating? You gotta plan another wedding, too, for the end of the year?

What's it called? "Serial monogamy?" Serial monogamy is characterized by a series of long-term, exclusive sexual relationships entered into consecutively over the lifespan. This behavior is a variant of monogamy, in which a given individual has only one sexual partner throughout life. This behavior is sometimes referred to as a form of, or replacement for, polygamy. However, this practice inherently excludes the practice of having multiple simultaneous sexual partners. Thanks, Wikipedia.

--> I predict that (A) they will break up before they get down the aisle, or (B) they'll be divorced within a year after their wedding. I can seriously bet on that with a straight face, and I'm not a gambler. You can do better, Tracey. This has got to be a dick thing. Eddie must be packing extraordinarily because it's pretty nasty and complicated.

"The news comes just days after Murphy denied suggestions that they were engaged, when Tracey was spotted with a diamond on her ring finger at an LA movie premiere. At that point, Murphy said: "No, this isn't an engagement ring. If I were gonna do an engagement ring, it would be much bigger." He asked Edmonds to marry him just two days later.

'Tracey and Eddie were engaged last Wednesday,' Edmonds' assistant told E! News. 'Tracey and Eddie are both very much in love and are excited about spending the rest of their lives together.' Representatives for Murphy, who is the father of Melanie Brown's baby Angel Iris Murphy Brown, have refused to comment on the story."

And I once was an Eddie Murphy fan.

well, i liked 'em.

This weekend, I rented two movies (ahem, box office bombs) that I hadn't seen before. They were different, yet resonated with me in very cool and intelligent ways.

The first movie was Premonition, starring Sandra Bullock. It was in the movie theaters a few months ago, and it didn't gross much, so it's now on DVD. If I had to rate it, I would give the movie 4 stars for psychological thriller-enthusiasts like myself; 5 stars for weirdos; and 3.5 for the intelligencia. What I liked was that the plot was intricately planned, and that the movie was intentionally set to throw you off and confuse the hell out of you. I had to honestly watch the special features on creating the film to understand what was going on and why. Without giving away too much of the plot, I'll simply compare it to those time-warped, suspenseful movies like The Sixth Sense with Bruce Willis and Deja Vu with Denzel Washington. It fits right into it's genre, and is pretty good--if you can get through the sometimes sappy love and family scenes. The only down side is that I'm still somewhat confused about it. Maybe I'm just being slow. And that's not surprising.

The second movie was Spike Lee's She Hate Me. I'm not sure when it came out, but talk about your freaky sense gone wild! If you have never heard of it, the movie circles this professional black man who gets involved with some wealthy lesbians in a way-less-than-conventional way. That's the most I can say without giving the movie away! I'd rate it as a 5 for the intelligencia; 5 for the freaks; and a 2 for conservatives. There's a lot of sex, but Spike makes a big splash with his larger-than-life messages on stuff that just sucks in society. I understood that he was speaking on the black family structure; homosexual and heterosexual love; casual sex and human conception; corruption in big time businesses; institutionalized racism...shoot, I guess I'm smart, but it's apparent. It was good, though. J and I laughed a lot through it because Spike Lee is a crazy genius. Him and his camera angles and whatnot. I found myself asking if it could really happen, but I was nonetheless enthralled and thrilled. I recommend it, except if you're thoroughly close-minded. Or work at Enron.

eight incredibly random things about me

1. “Red juice" gives me a hangover. Or should I say, strawberry, cherry, raspberry, fruit punch, or any flavor consisting of a mix of these. That includes Kool-aid, Fruitopia, or any other beverage of a reddish consistency. Upon ingestion, I get really hyper and will laugh at anything. A few hours later, I crash and develop a headache. Crazy, right? But it’s true, I tell you!

2. My favorite author and I share the same birthday. Tayari Jones/November 30. I also share my birthday with my boyfriend’s oldest nephew and a god-sister.

3. I am the oldest daughter, the oldest granddaughter, and the oldest great-granddaughter on my mother’s father’s side and my mother’s mother’s side. It isn’t always being the oldest and having to go through things “first.” You gotta break the parents in. You become the role model. You get in trouble first. It’s so much pressure! Oldest kids can attest to this!

4. I have a long list of rational and irrational fears. They include (not necessarily in order) death, flying, squirrels, “broken” elevators, big ole’ hairy spiders, lightning, fire, drowning, birds, demons, high bridges, "what if" factors, crazy homeless people, black ice, Bloody Mary, my brakes giving out, the unknown, and the fact that the earth is warming up with me on it.

5. I was fired from my very first job. I worked at a Cinemark movie theater for a year, almost to the day. I moved from the concession stand to the box office after about six months and a 15 cent raise, which I thought was great at 16. (Ha!) Obviously, I wasn’t good because I kept getting written up for a short drawer. (I now know that I kept giving cash refunds to credit card customers. A Big No-No. But, it was something they didn’t teach me coming from the concession stand, where all I had to worry about was cup and popcorn refills.) One day, I went into the break room, and I had no hours on the schedule. (Me and about three other people, I might add.) They called me in and, sure enough, I was let go for too many write-ups. It was gay because I never did receive my one-year pin. I boo-hooed something terrible that day. A month later, I moved to Atlanta to go to Spelman. Bitches.

6. I prefer “older” music over all this new mess. In my 200+ cd collection, I have plenty of Luther, Teddy P, Donny Hathaway, Silk, Brownstone, Mariah (when “Carey” was still on the end), SWV, Toni Braxton, Boyz II Men, and Jodeci, just to name a few. I loooove 80's and 90’s music! I can't forget to mention Gloria Gaynor, Heatwave, The Average White Band, The Art of Noise...shoooot! I’d pop in a Zhane or Jade album in a second over some Beyonce and Keyshia Cole! I must add that I graduated from high school in 2002 and from college last May. People don’t realize how “young” I am. I guess I just have an older spirit!

7. My mother is 16 years, 4 months, and 9 days older than me. You do the math!

8. Lastly, I believe I’ve found my soulmate. My Johnny is exactly like me, yet so different from me. I hope he’s the one. Only God knows. We’re so happy with one another’s company, and we’re best friends. It’s been a consistent and drama-free two and a half years, so we’ll see. We'll see.

my first "what the hell happened?" posting

Declaration: I'm going to christen Fridays as "What the Hell Happened?" days. By the time Friday rolls around, I'm tired as all heck from doing nothing during the week. Well, I work out 6 days a week, but while at work, I sit and rot, or spin around in my chair for hours at a time. So, today marks a new tradition to keep my Friday as upbeat and as happy as it is. "What the Hell Happened?" features celebs at their worst. Whether they have let themselves go for life, or are just having a bad time right now, I will find that photo and post it! Gotcha! Just call me the pappa--paparat--well, dammit, I can't spell it! Just say I got your picture!! And I have a B.A. in English...sad. Let's have a good laugh, and Happy Friday!!

I was listening to V103 this morning, and the "old school" song of the day was Tevin Campbell's Can We Talk? I hadn't seen a picture of him in years. And I'm appalled. I used to love him, but now he's just gross. It's sad what drugs and an alternative lifestyle can do to you. I'm gonna leave it at that...

So, Brit's at it again. She's walking around, just looking like she done lost her damn mind. I said it before, and I'm gonna say it again. She needs to toughen up. You're a mother, for God's sake! Black women have been doing it for generations. Ooo! Don't get me started! Just stop it, Britney! You look dumb as all hell!

Now we know George always had rainbow extensions. But this mugshot shows that he needs to comb or perm them suckas. Even if it is a muggie. And is he high, or what? Bless his heart. Jesus, help us all.

Glllooooorrrriiiiiiaaaaaa...

robert better play like snoopy here...

It's Thursday and I feel like this already.

Sit, Snoopy! Stay! Good boy! Now play dead! Play dead, Snoops! Snoopy? Umm...Snoopy?

So, who hasn't heard the remix to R. Kelly's Same Girl? I am appalled at the craziness that goes on within those four minutes. If you haven't heard it, please do so. He goes from a remixy sound with T-Pain whining in the background, to a "snap song," to something reminiscing of what Robert thinks is Michael Jackson. I give it 1/2 a star and a recommendation to be demolished, burnt, and buried asap!

Like my J pointed out last night, Robert is getting ready to go to trial. http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/illinois/chi-ap-il-r.kellyaccusation,0,7488860.story It's about time. So another R. Kelly gospel album will be released soon...I Believe I Can Fly (Out of This Here Court) and He Saved Me Again will probably be featured tracks.

If Robert goes to jail, he'd better play like Snoopy here. They gon' be after him!

vicky is now ironically fighting the government dog

Michael Vick, Michael Vick. Since I hail from Portsmouth, Virginia, some small distance from the "Birthplace of the Vick," and live in Atlanta, Georgia, some small distance from the "Field of the Vick," I feel particularly close to this whole dog-fighting case. However, I'm not sure what to make of it. I don't condone breeding already-aggressive puppies to fight almost until one loses a limb or ear or something. That is so sad, and those dogs don't know any better. I started out as an Atlanta Falcons fan when I first moved down here. (Living with a die-hard Chicago fan has altered that...) But with Vick being banned from camp and, presumably, more punishment will come with that indictment, I think that rooting for Atlanta this year may be a bit difficult. It's crazy how one man can carry a team, but look at Lebron. (Who I like, I liiike!) With the possibility of Vick being out for the upcoming season until this case blows over, I may just have to completely hang up the black and red. It'll make nice decoration.
http://msn.foxsports.com/nfl/story/7052768?MSNHPHMA Dammit, black man! We can't get it right, can we?!

I remember listening to Ryan Cameron last Thursday or Friday afternoon, and listeners were calling in with their opinions on the entire dog-fighting issue. This one woman called in, and I swear, she probably got on the bad side of Ryan, Ryan's staff, and most listeners tuning in. This woman claims she works at a vet's office, but sees nothing wrong with dog-fighting. She actually stated, "As long as it's done properly, I don't see nothing wrong with it." Properly. As in, "Dogs, get into the ring and let's have a good, fair, clean fight?" Unt uh. Not happening. This woman has personally seen what fighting dogs look like once the fight is over, and was adamant about it being too okay. She started going on and on about some law in the 1970's and something. I cringed and turned on my cd player.

Then I thought about it. Somebody should have gotten her name because she was definitely into dog-fighting. No doubt. I'd be the "snitch" if I got paid for it!

Dog-fighting. I'm not a part of those crazy-ass "People Eating Tasty Animals" folks, but it is still a sad, sad thing. Especially for us black folk. It's funny, though. Michael Vick is now the dog, having to fight his way against the pitbull government, the NFL, practically all other folks out to get him. I guess he hopes that having that big dog, Billy whatnot, will help defend him. That lawyer helped Monica Lewinsky. Hm. But where is she now? Hmm...will Vick disappear, too?...We shall see.

In other news, Go Bears!

i did the souljah boy behind my eyelids all weekend...

What I missed in Atlanta this past weekend...Yes, I live in Atlanta, but I find that doing the "touristy" things are a bit mundane and overpopulated. People don't understand why I'm not constantly catching the celebrities and such that jet-sail through the city all the time. (A) I live in Vinings, some good 20 miles from downtown Atlanta. (B) Have you seen downtown Atlanta traffic on any given weekend night? But I must admit that, had I the money, I would have been sitting on Marietta Road by Philips Arena in all that traffic this past Friday to see that Beyonce concert. I swear for Lord! It was enough just trying to make it to my boyfriend at 4 p.m. downtown when he got off of work! But tickets were $75 bucks just for the rafter seats, plus fees and taxes, and I was thinking, "Hm. Beyonce, or rent?" Being a big fan that I am, I can't help but feel that I missed out big-time, especially when I visited Juiicy Scoop's wonderful blog page that featured Beyonce doing the outrageously dumb Souljah Boy dance. Man. [shaking head] That would have been the perfect blog entry!

Instead, I were unconscious from womanly pains for 12 hours on Saturday and 4 hours on Sunday. I mean, I was drunk sleep. I would lay up on the sofabed in the living room that J and I pull out occasionally when we don't feel like sleeping in the actual bed (lazy, I know), and 1 second later, J is waking me up. I was sleep for hours and didn't even know I was gone! All slobberific and stuff. But I do feel well-rested this Monday morning. Amazingly.

I'm not sure if I can say I had a great weekend or not. But I'm planning for this coming weekend. The Simpsons! Yeaa! Makes the work-week go faster. Makes me do the Souljah Boy. Weeee. Superman...that hoe?